Vision to ... a Jumbled Mess

There are so many things that can be done. There are so many things that need to be done. There is so much work that my mind gets lost just thinking about what is needed to even start (not that it's difficult for my mind to get lost or anything). The obvious starting point is with myself and my own family, but what next. My wife and i are getting more involved with the youth group in our church, and that's a good start. If we want to change the world, it starts with the youth. Also, one of the things that i want to do is to write a book. I have started this many times, but cannot come up with a set vision and direction for that book. Right now it's all a jumble of facts, concepts, and images. It's easy to lose focus on what the reality is and where we need to go, but that is key to success. If we don't understand the endpoint we can't reach that endpoint. In order to bring about change on a large scale it requires the involvement of many people working together. One person cannot do it alone. So refining & spreading the vision is a key to external change. Of course that also requires understanding your own vision. After all, how can we explain what we don't necessarily understand ourselves? So what are some of the keys to this change? Well since the problem is that youth are not trained to be and act like adults, than that needs to be a starting point as well. Boy, my mind is a jumbled mess. Everything here is valid and valuable, but without direction and action, it is nothing more than a jumbled mess.

Image from Robbie1 used under cc license.

Vision to Reality - Facing the Giant

So now what? This is the difficult part. I see and for the most part understand the problem. That's the easy part. It's what to do next that is the difficult part. The problem exists on so many levels in our society that it is nigh impossible to tackle it all. It deals with institutions and views that are ingrained into our society and that have been a part of this culture and environment for over a century. How do you break the backbone of a century's old view and mentality that pervades an entire culture, society, and world? How do you tackle something that is so far encompassing that it invades us in every area that we live? It is defined in how we work, what we do in our "spare" time, how we live, how & what we eat, what we teach our kids, how our kids learn, our own expectations, what we see and invades our home. How does one even pretend to tackle this problem without being destroyed by it?

There are individuals, families, and even entire communities that have seen these problems for a long time and instead of fighting it have separated themselves from the problem and the society that it pervades. At times they have become outsiders looking in critically and rejecting our society as a whole, or they just don't even care and would rather be their own entity and allow the rest of society slowly destroy itself while they go on living their own lives. I can understand it, and in a way it is a very awe inspiring view to see the battle against the onslaught of outside forces. However, it does so little to actually create the change that needs to occur.

So how do you fight a battle that is so much larger than yourself that you can't even see & comprehend the vastness of it? How do you fell a giant that encompasses a planet in the face of a people that doesn't even recognize that the giant exists, that may only see a finger or toe of the giant and attempts to fight only that part, or that don't even understand that the giant is a problem? The answer is that one person alone can't... but then we never really are alone, are we?
II Kings 6:1-23 especially vs. 16 "And he answered, Do not fear, for those with us are more than those with them."

Image from andyburnfield used under cc license.

Redefining the Vision

It's nice to not be feeling miserable all the time. Now i just need to get past the complete exhaustion phase and the massively stressed out one. Anyways, that's neither here nor there.
I think it's time to reiterate and refine my vision, and to look at what i am doing and needing to do to bring that vision to fruition.

What is my vision? My vision is to have youth and young adults prepared for adulthood, trained to be adults and able to handle healthy relationships with their peers and those of the opposite sex. To mature and grow in their relationship with God as well as to become leaders and successful as people.
So, what does that mean? That's a good question. I'm glad that you asked. It means.............. Um, could you repeat the question please? Oh, yeah. What it means is that we need to prepare youth to be adults. Instead of just expecting that one day youth will be adults and will act like adults when they mature enough, we need to be helping them prepare and grow into adulthood. Unless youth are trained and expected to act like adults, chances are they are not going to.
Where has this vision come from? Our society has created this idea, this concept, that youth are kids and not adults. They are not supposed to act like or become adults until they are at least 21. The time between 17 or 18 and 21 is the ramp up stage in which they put their childish ways behind them and prepare for the real world. Prior to that is the adolescent stage in which youth rebel against authority and begin to become their own person. Adolescence is a troublesome time in which youth begin to "find themselves" and define who they are by standing against authority. The problem that i see is that these are modern and very unhealthy concepts. Traditionally, prior to the industrial revolution and the modern educational system, children were raised to become adults. When they were young, children were expected to help out and be involved where they could. As they grew they were given more and more responsibility until they were around the age of puberty (much older than puberty hits now, usually around 15-18). At that time they went through a rite of passage and became adults. As adults they were expected to act like adults, and to be able to provide and take care of a family. Which, with some help from family and the community, they could do since they spent their lives training and preparing for it. Now, however, even after 12+ years of "formal" education and many times 4 years of post high-school education, young adults still don't know how to be adults and take care of and provide for their families.
So, what now? That's a good question that i don't have enough time to get into right now. Check back tomorrow when i want to deal with plans, purposes, and steps to take.

Image from HelenaN used under cc license.

Great Expectations

So, how do we develop growth and maturity in young adults? How do we nurture it and encourage it? I don't think that there is an easy answer to these questions. It's like asking a salesman how to sell something to someone. You could ask 100 different salesmen and get 100 different answers. Ultimately the core of the issue is that when a young person is encouraged to act immaturely, chances are, they will. It's like trying to teach a 3-year old how to behave. If you model, encourage, and reward good behavior, chances are you will have children that have good behavior.

When a young adult see another person acting like a mature, responsible adult putting what's best ahead of what they necessarily want, chances are they will learn from that. If a young adult sees themself as the only person that they know acting the right way, they will be more likely to become frustrated and discouraged and more likely to give up on the process. One of the key things to remember is that if a young adult is expected to act like an adult and treated like an adult they will be more willing to be that way. However if they don't know what that looks like, expectations won't mean a thing.

Image from celikins used under cc license.

What does it take?

What does it take for a person, a group of people to grow and mature? When i look at our youth today i can see that many times a young adult can act mature and grow to become a healthy adult in an environment that is less than healthy. In these situations there are a couple of things that build this support, 1) people that stand in the gap, 2) their willingness to be that mature person, and 3) their relationship to God.

It is important when attempting to develop change that there is something or someone standing beside or behind this person. No one can really grow and mature alone. If we don't see or know what it means to grow and be a part of something bigger than ourselves chances are, we may not. And, we can't reach bigger and higher than ourselves without help from other people. Just as we need to be a strength and support to others. A lone tree standing against the wind will not stand for long or very well when the winds get rough. When there is a group of trees standing together, the wind cannot blow them down so easily.

If someone is not willing to be that strong person, that mature person, chances are pretty good that they aren't going to become that person. That's not to say that an unwilling person isn't going to or can't become a strong, healthy, and mature person, but chances are until they see the need to change, they are not going to change. The need and desire for change can come from within or without. Circumstances and situations can lead the change. They can be the spark that lights the fire and gets the blaze going. It can also be the fan that helps and encourages the flame to spread. However, what is really needed is the desire and need to change coming from within. A spark from outside is not going to do much with the fuel that's inside. A group of people can push, pull, and drag a person into position of maturity, but it's not going to mean much if they are an unwilling protagonist.

Lastly, and by far the most important, is our need and search for God. When our plans are, well exactly that, our plans, they only get a part of the picture. When our source is much larger than ourselves, and we tap into that source, our plans are a part of His plans and become more than we can ever imagine. If we are relying on our own imagination and ideas we are limiting our potential. God is the source of all creativity, maturity, and strength. He gives it to us when we have nothing to give. He is the source and the great director. Ultimately it is His masterpiece and we are only the work and progress.

Something to keep in mind. All three of these things are not required. A single person can do a great deal on their own. An unwilling host can become the source of great change. And God does not necessarily need us to recognize Him for Him to work through us. All three of these things together have to potential to produce maturity, growth, and much needed change.

Image from tp used under cc license.

Frustrations and Distractions

It's so easy to get distracted in who we are that we lose focus on who God is and who He wants us to be. It's easy to get caught up in the things that are frustrating and distracting, the things that suck our attention and we lose focus on the things that really need our attention. It becomes, "what will make me feel better?", "what do i want?", or even "what am i supposed to do?" rather than, "Who are You God, and what are you looking for?". The only way to really know God, and to know the plan for our lives is to get to know Him. Spend time with Him reading the word, praying, seeking to understand Him. He reveals Himself to those who diligently seek Him, and to those called according to His purpose. So what are we doing to know Him more?

What is Faithfulness?

So what is so special about faithfulness? I have been really mulling this over in my mind for the last few days or so. I have come to realize that faithfulness is something existent in all people. Everyone is faithful to something or someone. Even those of us that we would call unfaithful are faithful to something; whether it be our emotional desires at the time, our selfish wants, or what our best friend wants, we are faithful to something. The question then becomes, what or who are we faithful to? Are we faithful to ourselves? Are we faithful to our feelings? Are we faithful to our friends? Are we faithful to God? Who or what are we faithful to?

I think in working with the young adults and the lesson for this week i will be focusing on helping them to 1) identify examples of faithfulness & unfaithfulness, 2) understand what fruit and faithfulness really are, 4) understand where fruit comes from and how it comes to be and 3) apply it. What ways are we faithful? How do we become faithful to the right things? What are three things that i can do today to be more faithful to the right things?

Image from Tracey Holland used under cc license.

Help & Hindurance

I have been working on a lesson for the Jr. High youth this past week. I am finding that curriculum's over all to me tend to be more limiting than necessarily helpful. They have some good ideas for games and such, but when it comes to the lesson, especially in this one we are using right now, it tends to be a little simple minded and milk minded rather than meat minded. It's the kind of lesson i would expect from or for a pre-school and elementary level youth, or for someone who is brand new as a Christian. Not necessarily what is appropriate or best for those in the stages of becoming young adults.

The lesson that i was given for this week talks about the part of the fruit of the Spirit that is faithfulness. As soon as i was assigned to this topic, in my mind i put some ideas together as to what i wanted to touch on. When i read the lesson in the book my reaction was that half of the youth could do this lesson from years of experience in Sunday School. It's a simple concept, Christ is faithful. He is faithful to us as evidenced by scripture. Don't get me wrong. It is a very true and real concept, but at this stage in their life, the youth should be working on applying and bringing these concepts into fruition not just learning that Christ is faithful. If anything, at this age the young adults should already know how to do this and be teaching others to do the same. Yet the core of this lesson is; Christ is faithful, so what does that mean to you?

I guess that this bugs me because it simply reinforces this concept that Jr. High youth are nothing more than bigger kids. Sure they act like little kids quite a bit, but they have so much untapped potential that with a little bit of hard work and effort, they could easily become spiritual powerhouses... well, maybe not necessarily "easily" since becoming a spiritual powerhouse is far from easy, but you get my drift. If they are not trained at a young age to become powerhouses, chances are they may not reach that potential. I guess that this kind of thing just really frustrates me because i see it as being more of a hindrance than a help.

The Other Side

I think i'm beginning to understand things on a completely different level. I don't really like my job a whole lot. I basically work the job to pay the bills and have the insurance so that i can come home, spend some time with my family, work with the youth, etc. Last night, however, i began to see a little better how the other side lives. All my life i have spent in a Christian environment. My family growing up was involved in the church. I was always involved in the church. That continued on into my high-school and college years. There was a time that i rebelled and "turned away" from God, but i knew better. I knew that that was not going to work. My relationship and connection to God were too strong for a time of rebellion to really stick. It's like when you get really mad at the best friend you have had for years. You argue, you fight, but you are too heavily invested in each other that a stupid fight really can't destroy what you have built over the decades. So i have done the party scene, and the drama, and everything related to that before.

Last night however opened my eyes a little bit more. My work had a big celebration. We had reached a significant milestone that had taken a great deal of work and dedication by most everyone to achieve. So with a limited budget the management team put together a celebration. There was karaoke, hor d' ovures (i don't know how to spell it), and a pay bar. So my wife and i went. I'm never really that comfortable at these kinds of parties, but it was a chance to get away without the little ones which is nice sometimes. So the festivities began. Most everyone was drinking, hanging out and talking, and either singing or making a fool of themselves, or just watching it all.

I began to realize, "This is their life". So many of my co-workers work so that they can pay the bills and on the weekend get together with other coworkers and/or friends, go out to the bar and do exactly what everyone was doing last night. Get drunk, make fools of themselves, and complain about something or other. Others, instead of drinking, spend their weekends watching sports, getting lost in movies, whatever. This is the highlight of their week! There is no passion. There is no purpose. There is no direction or real desire... other than getting their weekend fix. It's no wonder everyone is always so miserable. Couple relationships have no solid foundation as a result they fall apart on a whim. Work, well work is just work. Depression is rampant. A big part of it is that for my coworkers, there is no real purpose other than to simply escape on the weekends. Where there is no vision the people perish. Where there is no purpose, there is no hope. There is only depression, escapism, and/or addiction.

I think i'm starting to understand a little bit better...

Image from Vinnn used under cc license.

What is in a Name?

It's amazing looking at the names of God. God has so many names that we don't consider at times. Each of His names have a reason, have a story, and have power. For example:
JHWH-Rapha’ (Raphah) – “The God that Heals You” Exodus 15:22-27

The Israelite people had just left Egypt where they had seen God work and do some amazing things there. God had taken one of the most powerful nations in the world, and in a matter of days had brought it to it's knees. Pharaoh went from laughing at the idea of the Israelites simply going out to worship, to begging them to leave permenantly. God had put into place each of the 10 plagues at their appropriate times. Everything from the Nile river becoming blood and overrun with frogs, to boils on the body, to the death of every firstborn male. The God of the Israelite people "I Am" / JHWH brought out of their slavery and bondage. One of the first stops that they make takes them to Marah where the waters were bitter. There the people complained / murmured. So God healed the bitter waters with a tree. When He did this, God made a promise to the people. If they sought Him and His will, listening to Him and keeping His instructions, they would not have any of the diseases that had been placed on the Egyptians... because He is the Lord our healer.

Every single one of God's names has a reason, a story, and a power both for the Israelite people as well as for you and me;

JHWH-Elyon (‘elyown) – The Lord Most High - Psalm 7:17 ; Psalm 47:2

El-Elohim-JHWH – Lord God of gods - Joshua 22:22

JHWH-Hossenu – The Lord out Maker - Psalm 95:6

JHWH-Roi – the Lord My Shepherd - Psalm 23:1

JHWH-Tsebahoth (Sabaoth) – “The Lord of Hosts” - I Samuel 1:3

JHWH-Shalom – “The Lord our peace”, or “the Lord send peace” - Judges 6:24

JHWH-Mekaddishkem – “The God that Sanctifies You” - Exodus 31:13

JHWH-Nissi – “The Lord our Banner” - Exodus 17:8-16

JHWH-Rapha’ (Raphah) – “The God that Heals You” - Exodus 15:22-27

JHWH-Jirah – “The Lord will Provide” - Genesis 22:1-19

El-Roi – “The God Who Sees” (…Who i Have Seen”) - Genesis 16:1-15

Image from Bert Werk used under cc license.

Decisions! Decisions! Decisions!

Why is it that we assume that teenagers are supposed to be immature and make stupid decisions? I know that i caught myself doing it yesterday. I was at work and i was talking with someone about their teenaged grandson. From what this lady was saying, it sounded like her grandson was making very wise decisions about his relationships, dating, and girls. The more i listened to her talking about him the more this teenager / young man reminded me of myself at that age. She asked my take on his situation as if she couldn't understand how he, as a teenager, could be making wise decisions. While talking to her i realized that i was almost as surprised as she was that her grandson was acting this way. He seemed to have a pretty clear head on his shoulders. The decisions that he was making were well thought out, based on experience and logic, and meant present self-sacrifice in order to complete a future goal. I was actually quite impressed, but it was funny because she was worried about him, that he was making wise decisions, and if that was healthy.

So that brings me back to my initial question. Why do we assume that teenagers are supposed to be immature and make stupid decisions? Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old(er) he will not depart from it. When someone is raised to make wise decisions financially, with regards to friends, in their educational and social endeavors, etc. that will undoubtedly follow them. Chances are they will end up making stupid mistakes from time to time, but that doesn't mean that a teenager is not capable of making wise decisions on a regular basis.

The other day i was talking with a couple that is around my and my wife's same age who are making some decisions that may not be the wisest. In this one area they are starting to seriously hurt themselves and may be needlessly putting themselves in a very treacherous position... again. It's almost like they are not considering the long term consequences to their action but rather making the decision based on what they want and could get now. I thought that that was supposedly an "adolescent" mentality. It's interesting because many of the youth of my generation were raised with the mentality that it was alright for them to make stupid decisions because they were teenagers, they were going to make wrong decisions, and so it was OK. Now 10 - 20 years later so many people of my generation are doing exactly the same thing. Shouldn't we have moved beyond that "phase"? Why is it still occurring? Simple, we (my generation) were raised to think that we were supposed to act this way and that it is OK, so now we still are!

When youth are raised to think that being a kid is all about fun without consideration for how what they do affects themselves and others, in the long run or the present, they tend to grow up to be immature adults making foolish decisions.

When i was my father's son,
Tender and the only one in the sight of my mother,
He also taught me, and said to me:
"Let your heart retain my words;
Keep my commandments, and live.
Get wisdom! Get Understanding!
Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth.
Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you;
Love her, and she will keep you.
Wisdom is the principle thing;
Therefore get wisdom.
And in all your getting, get understanding. - Proverbs 4:3-7

Image from mark_twells used under cc license.

So What's the Equation for Freedom?

It being 4th of July and all, i have been so tempted to write an article "celebrating" America's freedom. Our freedom to become slaves to media franchises with their own (not so) hidden agendas. Our freedom to work so hard that we alienate our children and place them under government care to be raised & instructed. Our freedom to allow Supreme Court Justices to make decisions for the people and legislate from the bench because of how they decide that they want to "(mis)translate" our Constitution. At this point i have already spent more time on this off subject than i had planned to.

What i really wanted to look at today deals in part with one of those previous topics. Who is really raising our kids? There was a time when most parents raised their own kids. They taught them the fundamentals, there was a school that taught students what they needed to know to succeed in life. Reading, writing, math, a little science, and some history. From there the kids would go home and learn a trade as part of a family business or farm. If they decided not to follow the family tradition, they were able to work as an apprentice in another area to develop the skills necessary to do that trade. When they hit a certain age (early to mid teens usually), they were treated as adults, expected to act that way, and did. They had everything they needed to survive, succeed, and raise a family of their own. Now, less than 150 years later our lives have "improved" to the point where in order to "succeed" and "do well" one must have at least 16 years of "formal" education, and even then people leave school with no idea as to how to do what they have been "taught" to do. Even in lower education there is so much time focused on information that will most likely never be used again. For instance, how many people really apply questions like those below to their lives or work?

Graph the equation and solve the problems below
45X^2(squared) + 15XY - 16Y^2 + 12 = 152
If X = 8 what does Y = ?
If X = -12... If X = p...

or even

What factors of 84 are also prime numbers?

So much time is spent away from home, students are expected to learn facts and equations that they will never use or need in real life only to leave school unprepared to succeed. Meanwhile, an ever widening division between them and their parents is formed.

Many times what formal education does develop is immature individuals who have no idea what it means to be adults, and who are full of tons of mostly useless information with no idea as to how to apply it. Meanwhile those who have so much to teach their children about being adults, spouses, and parents are spending more and more time away from those that need them the most.

Image from ~Darin~ used under cc license.

Vision! Direction?

It's amazing when you have the vision and the desire for something and that desire is so big that you can't even function properly in your daily life. Going to work only makes sense because you need to pay the bills so that you can do what has been laid on your heart to do. You would rather be doing that thing for your job than the job that you have. More and more, this is where my wife and i have been / been going. Working with youth and young adults has always been a desire for us. However, that desire is being rekindled more and more into a passion and life focus. At our church, we are being given, relatively, a very loose leash when it comes to working with the youth. The youth pastor trusts us and our vision, and with him having to take more responsibility in other areas he doesn't have the time or ability to take on even more. So now we have to take this direction and use it. So we will see where we go from here.