What is love?

Love = not giving up...
Love = putting someone else first...
Love = making a decision because it is what is best, not necessarily for myself...
Love = frustration...
Love = time...
Love = work...
Love = desire...
Love = action...
Love = being there...
Love = hope...
Love = doing what you can't stand in order to...
Love = letting go...
God = love...
Love = ???

The Effective Fervent Prayers...

It's funny how God works sometimes. Just the subtle ways that He brings things into perspective. I was getting myself up and going this morning and i have tried to make it a habit of spending time praying for our church leaders each day, especially as we are going through the transition of searching for a new lead pastor.

Prayer has been a real struggle for me lately. It seems like i have gotten into the mentality in which i spend little time really focused on prayer. It's hard to explain, but my prayer has not be up to par even for my own less than best expectations for myself at times. However, this morning a verse came into my head as i was getting ready but i couldn't piece it all together. "The effective fervent prayer of the righteous man availeth much, to the tearing down of strongholds..." and i couldn't remember how the rest of it went. I knew that there was more along the lines of tearing down the strongholds, but i just couldn't get it. So i grasped onto that and held on.

When i came downstairs later where i could do a little research, i found something a little unexpected. I found the references to the verses i was looking for, only it wasn't what i was expecting to see. James 5:16 says,

Confess your faults to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

Then in 2Co 10:3-5 Paul says,

For though walking about in flesh, we do not war according to flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not fleshly, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds, pulling down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought into the obedience of Christ

As you can see, it's not the verse that i was quite expecting. And, since i am a man who does not like it when people take verses out of context in order to build their own point, it hit me kind of hard. They are both true separate as well as together. The effective fervent prayers of the righteous man avail much. They are spiritual warfare and they are mighty to God for the pulling down of strongholds, vain imaginations, every high thing that exalts itself... bringing into captivity every thought...

More than that, and what i won't get into at this time, is what each of these verses is talking about within their own context. They both have everything to do with everything else, and both require some more further study... but that's neither here, nor there for this point.

The point is that The effective fervent prayer of the righteous man does avail much... to the tearing down of strongholds, vain imaginations, every high thing that exalts itself... bringing into captivity every thought. If we are not praying effectively and fervently as i have struggled with not doing, well what then?

Image from shapeshift used under cc license.

Lord,

I so don't even want to be doing what i'm doing. This is getting so old right now. It's hard to accept and deal with the job and the roles that you have for us to play sometimes. The fact that my numbers are not up to par doesn't help matters any either. I don't know. Lord there is so much going on i just don't know where to go with it all.

Lord, i want to thank you for the many, many ways that you are blessing us. The many ways that you are taking care of us. Thank you for the little one that's on the way. Thank you for the little ones that you have already blessed us with. They are so amazing! The different things that they say, and the many ways that they bless us. Lord, help us to be good parents. Help us to make sure that they grow in desire of You. That they grow with a passion for You and for others. Help us to model that attitude and mentality Lord. Help us to be good parents as well. They so need that so much. Help them to have a passion and compassion for others.

Lord, i lift up the leadership in the church. I pray that You would continue to be working in them. I especially lift up PKB and his family. Watch over them as they take some time off of the stress and work to spend time with the family. Bless and keep them as they are traveling. Lord, i also lift up the B family to you. As Mr B and the rest of the board are making final decisions as to who to bring for the congregation to decide on, i pray for unity and strength in them. I pray that the man you have for the job would be the man chosen and quickly. Lord, be at work in all of this. And Lord, You know where we stand in all of this. You know the vision you have given to us. Bring us to this place. Your will be done.

In Christ's name we pray.

Amen

Process of Change: The "Rite" Stuff

I was doing some research on rites of passage and how they work when i came across some info that really brought some things together. A rite of passage is a ceremony or test that brings a person from one stage of life to another. For our sake, and as is most commonly seen. The rite of passage refers to the time at which a child becomes an adult. They go from living a life of very limited responsibility and training to being considered and treated as an adult. That includes taking on the rights and responsibilities of adults. It is something that has been lost quite possibly to the detriment of youth and our society.

It's interesting looking at these rites of passage and how they work. There are actually three very important parts (or stages) to a rite of passage. Each part has and holds a purpose that helps to give meaning to and define the process:
1) The first stage is the abandonment stage. It is a matter of leaving the old behind. Childhood is removed like an old robe or as an old shell abandoned by a hermit crab who has grown too big to fit into it anymore. It is the point at which a child recognizes that they are no longer to be a child. They are abandoning their childhood in an attempt to become more. To become an adult.
2) Next is the separation stage. The separation stage is about training, testing, & trials. It is the part of the process in which the youth proves that they are ready for the decision that has been made. These could be through physical, mental, and/or psychological trials. These things could be merely an expression of a decision made, or they could be actual real trials that the young person is required to fulfill in order to be allowed to pass on to the next stage.
3) The last stage of this process is the reintroduction into the social structure of the group. The child is no more. There is some sort of ceremony or ritual and the child becomes an adult with adult status. The group accepts them back as their own and they are now treated as adults and expected to act that way.

When i was doing this research i was fascinated by this because of how much it parallels baptism, which in turn parallels Christ's crucifixion process. As i have stated before, repentance, water baptism, and baptism in the Holy Spirit all include these same features. They are death and burial of the old self, a cleansing or work being done, and rebirth in a new form or as a new person. It seems that this three part process comes into play time and time again.

So, what does that mean for us? What do we do now?

History: The Loss of the Rite of Passage

History has become a very interesting subject to me. When i was in school i wasn't that interested in it as a subject as at the time it was more about a bunch of fact that we had to memorize than anything else. As time has gone by however, that has changed. I have begun to see history a bit more, and i have begun to recognize how it applies (or has not been applied) to today's culture.

Many things have changed in our societies over the generations, and especially in the last century & a quarter. In some instances it may be a good thing, but in many it's not so good. One of those things that i have noticed that has been lost by our society is the traditional ritual of coming of age or the rite of passage. This is a point in a person's life in which they make a transition from one stage of life to another. In this case from childhood to adulthood. It includes a ritual in which one who has been considered unable to make responsible decisions on their own and unable to be involved in the decision making process for others goes through a ritual (often through a physical, mental, or possibly academic trial) and when successful is considered an adult. They are treated like adults and expected to act as adults as well. Many times as a part of this process they are mentored by older men or women to prepare them for their expected roles as men & women, husbands & wives, workers & homemakers, etc in adulthood.

This tradition is one that appears to have become either entirely lost or simply ritualistic in nature with no real change in status or expectations for the individual coming of age. As a result it appears that with no defining line or set expectations children becoming adults may take less responsibility for their actions and have lower expectations for themselves. Added to that, the declining in the age of puberty & society's laxing of parental controls & sexual limitations creates a breeding ground for destructive lifestyles continuing through life.

Could reestablishing some of the more traditional rites of passage, with the proper mentoring & training, and placing greater and more defined expectations on those who complete it make a difference in some of these problems? Would it help to prepare our young people for adulthood? If so, what would it look like, and how could it be done? Just something to think about.

Image from ickna used under cc license.

Torn Asunder

There are so many things, so many frustrations in life right now (like there ever isn't?). It seems like there are problems and issues that i bring to God telling Him that they are too much to handle. I tell Him that i'm at an impasse and something needs to change. There are directions that i really want to go and doors that i really want to be open that aren't and that may not be anytime soon. In fact they may never be... but then again, they may also be at practically any moment.

Right now i am in a situation that is both at the top and at the bottom of the barrel. The part of my life that is at the top of the barrel is just that, a top experience in life. I couldn't say that it couldn't be better, but at this point it's the top i've been in a long time. At the same time that top experience is being pulled down by the bottom experience. The bottom is creating so much stress & tension that it's dragging the top down. At the same time the bottom is what is holding the top up. It is what is supporting the top. If the bottom weren't there the top would not be possible. Right now the top and bottom are balancing one another out. The top is preventing me from going insane due to the bottom, and the bottom is making the top possible. Together it feels like they are ripping me apart, and in so many ways i just want to throw in the towel.

So what happens if a third situation arises? It is neither of these two. It is not a top experience or a bottom experience. However, if it is accepted and taken both the bottom & the top experiences are lost. It has the potential to become a top experience, but quite obviously at a cost. Where do you go, and what do you do?

What God in the Spiritual Armor Means for Us

The other day i was thinking about how the presence of the trinity in the Spiritual Armor and the Spiritual Gifts parallel one another, and how there are so many connections that exist that we never see or understand.

As i was thinking about how the Holy Spirit is/= the Spirit of truth. He is the girdle of truth that protects the softest parts of our bodies. As a part of the spiritual armor he covers our stomach, intestinal area, and lower sexual organs. He covers the areas that are our appetites. Our two most natural and common appetites are nourishment and sexuality. Seen in obesity, drunkenness, and sexual problems. They are the weakest parts of our physical bodies, and also the most easily corrupted, hurt, and damaged parts of our lives.

The breastplate of righteousness is/= the righteousness of Christ. As armor, the breastplate covers our heart and lungs. It covers the areas of our body that control everything else. The lungs process the oxygen that we take in. They feed the blood (our life essence) that feeds the rest of the body. The heart pumps that blood throughout our body and is considered by many cultures to the the center of who we are. The righteousness of Christ covers this. It covers and protects who we are as a person. It covers how our daily lives come together and who we are in relationship with the father. It covers our actions and everyday lives. It is our lifeblood.

The helmet of salvation is/= our salvation. Salvation belongs to our God. It is the rebuilding of that relationship between us and God that was lost with the fall of man. As such, it is that salvation that covers our minds. It covers our thoughts and views. More than that, it covers what we believe, accept, and reject. When we are taught. When we learn & understand something, it all comes into and is filtered through our minds.

The enemy attempts to attack us at each of these different areas of our lives. He attacks our appetites. He attacks our actions and who we are as people. And, he attacks our thoughts and beliefs that give us a vision and a purpose. On the flip side it also means that when we struggle and continually have problems in any one of these areas of our lives, it means that that is the part of God, of the trinity that we do not have a grasp of or that we have let go of. We need to get a hold onto that again.

When we struggle with our appetites we need to seek out and better understand who and what the Spirit of truth is. We need to seek the Spirit of truth in our lives. When we struggle with our actions and who we are as people, we need to seek to reach and better understand our role with Christ. We need to seek Him and His vision for us. When we lose a grasp of what we believe, and when our faith, hope, and love are failing, that is when we are losing a grasp of who our Father is. That is when we need to seek Him the most. Thus understanding the spiritual armor becomes a role in who we are.

Image from North Grace Youth Camp used under cc license.

God in the Spiritual Armor

In one of my earlier posts i had mentioned the trinity (Father, Son, & Holy Spirit) of God showing up in unexpected places. I wasn't expecting to come back to it so soon, but something i was thinking about while helping to get the house cleaned up yesterday really brought it to the forefront of my mind. I processed it with my wife, but i wanted to post it here as well. However, it may not all fit in one post, so we will see...

Ephesians 6 talks about how our we do not wage war with other people, but that battles are with principalities & powers, spiritual wickedness in high places. As a result we need to have armor, not in the physical armor, but spiritual armor. Paul then goes on to write about that armor and goes on to list four actual pieces of armor a shield and a sword. Of those 4 pieces of armor, 3 are primarily for protecting the body itself. As a result that's where i want to focus.

Vs. 14 gird your loins with truth. In different version this is also called the Belt of Truth. This belt is not what we would consider a belt nowadays. It's not just a strip of leather that holds your pants. It is a piece of armor that could better be described as a girdle. It covers the lower private areas like a skirt would as well as the stomach area. It is meant to cover the softest and most vulnerable areas of your body. Next in vs. 14 it talks about the Breastplate of Righteousness. This Breastplate of Righteousness obviously covers a person's chest. It covers the heart & lungs which if pierced mean death. Next is the feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace. I am skipping over this as it is not what i would consider as life threatening in nature as the others. The final piece of actual body armor is the Helmet of Salvation that is covering the head & brain.

Piecing together this connection really began a while back when i was looking at Isaiah 64 where it talks about our righteousness is as filthy rags. Filthy rags don't really make very good armor, and certainly don't protect against an attack. They could hardly protect against the wind. Righteousness however, is continually associated with Christ. (At least 5 times in Romans, as well as in I Corinthians, Galatians, I Peter, & twice in Philippians). This came to mind as i was studying the spiritual armor but i didn't piece the rest of it together until later. In my previous study i really struggled with the belt of truth aspect because as is the question in today's society; what is truth? It wasn't until much later as i was reading John that i kept coming across a statement that i found to be interesting. Christ kept calling the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of Truth and since i had really been struggling trying to understand what truth is/= and how to distinguish truth from anything less, it really stuck out to me. Finally the connection clicked and i saw those two aspects together in the armor. The righteousness of Christ & the Spirit of Truth. At that point it was just a matter of looking... and sure enough. Now that i was looking for it, it was as plain as day! The helmet of salvation. Salvation from our sins to bring us back through repentance to a right relationship with God.

There it is, plain as day if you know what to look for. The trinity in the spiritual armor. The Holy Spirit is/= our Girdle of Truth. The righteousness of Christ =/is the Breastplate of Righteousness. The Helmet of Salvation is/= our re-formed relationship to God.

So what? What does this mean, and what does it have to do with anything? That's a great question and i'm glad you asked. More on that next time.

Pastor = Shepherd

It seems as thought now a days we as a church & a people see a pastors role as being simply that of a preacher, administrator, and one who encourages you when you are down. We expect the pastor to preach a good sermon on Sunday morning and to take care of church "things". Many times the pastor appears to be judged by how strong his preaching is and how much that preaching "feeds" us. But, is this really what a pastor's role is?

One of the things that i have found interesting over the years is that the word pastor actually is literally translated as shepherd. In fact in Spanish the word actually is shepherd. Well, so what? What does that have to do with anything? Actually, it has alot to do with alot of things. In order to really understand what a pastor's role is, we first need to understand what a shepherd is. I shepherd's job is both very simple, and very complex. Simply, a shepherd's job is to care for the flock. However, as many know, this is much easier said than done. Let's take a look at just a few of the facets involved in the role of the pastor.

First off, it is the pastor's job to feed his flock. This is a mentality and a view that pervades the church body, but that is not strictly true. The shepherd does not actually feed the flock. It is his job to bring the flock from pasture to pasture so that the flock can eat. He does not sit there and hand feed one sheep after another. He can only bring them to the right pasture so that they can feed themselves. If the shepherd had to do all of the feeding the flock would die of malnutrition. On top of that, if sheep remain in one place for too long they decimate the grass and plants in that area. Thus they need to only remain in one place for a period of time before going on to greener pasture where they can feed off of new grass. How many of us are feeding ourselves, and how many of us are expecting our pastor to be the one to feed us? How often do we get stuck on the same thing and the same way of doing things because "that's where God was moving before" and not move on to the new thing God has for us?

A shepherd's job is to correct his flock. Sheep are very finicky creatures. Many times they will do what they are supposed to, but many times they will do whatever someone else (or what they think someone else) is doing. As such if one sheep goes astray, many times it will lead the others with it. If one sheep continues to go astray time and time again, the shepherd will often have to take drastic measures. This can mean purposefully breaking one or more of the sheep's legs. By breaking the sheep's legs that sheep gets to the position where they can't do anything on their own. They are reliant upon the shepherd for food, water, protection, and even basic movement. The shepherd has to carry the sheep from one place to another on his shoulders. The sheep doesn't move until the shepherd moves them. The shepherd is that sheep's only means of protection. It can't run away. That shepherd becomes that sheep's life. As the weeks pass and the legs heal that sheep that was continually running away and leading others astray comes to the point where it is never willing to leave the shepherd's side again. Your pastor is your shepherd, are you ready for him to be a shepherd?

Other things a shepherd does... A shepherd is responsible for every action his sheep take. If a sheep gets into someone's garden and eats their vegetables, who takes responsibility for it? ... the sheep? The shepherd protects his flock from attacks and will pull the sheep from the mouth of the devourer. Look at the 23rd Psalm and try to see what would happen to a sheep that did not have a shepherd. A couple of years ago i put together the Unbeliever's 23rd Psalm to look at exactly this issue.

Mousie? Mousie? Where are you Mousie? Oh, There You Are.

It amazes me sometimes how often the trinity shows up in some very unexpected places. At least unexpected by me. A few years back i got into a discussion with someone who is involved in the oneness doctrine. The oneness doctrine teaches that there is no separation between the Father, Christ, & the Holy Spirit. No trinity, only 1... which is true. There is only 1 God. The Lord our God is One. Yet in 3 persons. In our discussion he gave me some literature talking about how in Matthew 28 the disciples are commanded to baptize in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, and yet every time in Acts the disciples baptize they do so in the name of Christ. The resultant conclusion is that as such the disciples recognized that the Father, Son & Holy Spirit are merely all titles for 1 God Jesus, for Christ, not three separate persons.

The Oneness Doctrine is an interesting (and flawed) view, but ultimately many of the teachings based off of it are very destructive. So i started to do some research praying that God would help me to see"the" truth and that i would be able to learn what He had to show me, and get past even my own misconceptions. (Even i know that i'm not right 100% of the time.) In doing this research i began to notice something. As much as i could find numerous different ways of arguing against the concept that the disciples only baptized in the name of Christ and not the trinity, the evidence did seem to show otherwise. So i brought it to God and asked Him what was going on here. As the research went on i began to realize that while yes, whenever the disciples were baptizing new believers in water the disciples did appear to only be baptizing in the name of Jesus, that wasn't the only thing going on.

I wasn't just seeing one baptism. I was seeing the baptism in water with the name of Christ, but i was also seeing baptism in the Holy Spirit & in power. I went through the research and scriptures, and yup, every time there it was; water baptism & baptism in the Holy Spirit. Well now, things were starting to make a great deal more sense. However, that still didn't account for the full trinity. That was only 2 baptisms, Christ & the Holy Spirit. So i started digging a little deeper and began to think about the fact that i was seeing 2 different baptisms and what baptism actually is. The very core of baptism is the principle of a death, a burial, & a resurrection. It's all very simple. The old man comes into the water, is buried beneath the water, and comes out a new man. Baptism in the Holy Spirit is death, burial, & resurrection into new power. So baptism of the Holy Spirit is for power, and water baptism is a physical baptism that is an evidence (representation) of...

OF COURSE!!! Water baptism is a physical evidence and representation of a personal choice that has already been made! It is a physical representation of repentance!!! Repentance is the first baptism. It is a choice to let the old sinful man die. Be buried in repentance... in God, and come out as a new man! That in itself is the first and probably the most important baptism! There you have it. The trinity in action. That brings us back to Matthew 28 Christ told the disciples to go and make disciples of all nations. Baptizing them... There are 2 commands here, 1) go and 2) make disciples of all nations. Understanding the scripture better it is saying that you make disciples (by) baptizing them into repentance, water baptism, & into the Holy Spirit teaching them to observe all that Christ commanded. That's how you make disciples. It all to fit together! The pieces worked!

Needless to say, i came out with a whole new understanding, and i came out able to better explain and deal with the questions that were brought to me in an attempt to draw me into this view. Ever since then i have begun to see the working of the trinity in places that i have never seen them before. In fact, did you know that you can find the trinity in the Spiritual Gifts? Just look at I Corinthians 12:4-6. How about the trinity in the spiritual armor in Ephesians 6? It's there. You just have to allow it to be found (here's a hint: compare Ephesians 6:14 to John 14:17, 15:26, & 16:13)

There is so much to be seen and found... so many ways that the truth's of the Bible are there connected to one another and woven together as only a master storyteller could weave. Yet all of these different books were written by different people from so many different times and walks of life. Some wise and seasoned like Solomon and Moses, others young and brash like Jeremiah & young David. All woven together as a spiritual masterpiece standing the test of time and trials by fire.

Image from Product of Newfoundland used under cc license.
Extra points to the person who can identify the movie that the quote in the title comes from!

It Makes All the Difference in the World...

What is the difference between the geek who constantly gets picked on and the cool kid? I wasn't really thinking about this so much on my own, but i had a dream that really started to make this a little more clear.

First off, a little background. I was a geek growing up. I didn't have a ton of friends and the places that i excelled were in my classes. The more i am working with youth the more i see young people that remind me of me at a younger age. Obviously i want to help them to get over the things that are holding them back and be a support to them. It's been difficult because i want to encourage them, but i don't want them to rely on or cling to me. That would be counterproductive. So it has been something that has been sitting in the back of my mind for a little while. I have had the answer sitting on the tip of my mind for a little while, but i have had a little bit of a difficulty piecing it together.

This morning as i was sleeping i had a dream. As with any dream alot was happening but what really stuck out was a point at which i was walking through a store and saw a couple of little kids there. They were maybe 6 or 7 years older. As i was walking by i could hear laughter. The kids were laughing and so was the store clerk. This one skinnier boy was being shoved and hit by another girl who was a little bit bigger than him. She wasn't so sure that she wanted to do this, but the other kids were egging her on and she was getting positive attention as a result so she kept going. Meanwhile, the boy seemed to not quite know what to do. He seemed to hesitate like he wanted to retaliate, but something held him back. Whether he knew he wasn't supposed to hit girls, or he was just too afraid. He hesitated and didn't do anything. I was really annoyed with the store clerk for laughing and encouraging the girl, but i was even more annoyed with the boy for just standing there.

I wanted to take the boy by the shoulders look him in the eye and ask him if what she was doing was actually physically hurting him. Obviously the physical pain wasn't really an issue. So i wanted to tell him to push her right back. He didn't need to hurt her. He just needed to do something to show her that he couldn't just be pushed around. If he did that there wouldn't have been an issue any more. He might get into trouble for shoving a girl, but it would have solved the problem. Instead of doing that, i kept on walking.

I woke up a little further into the dream and thought about what had happened. I realized that the issue wasn't that he didn't want to fight. You shouldn't hit, and especially guys shouldn't hit girls. The issue is that he just stood there and did nothing! I began to realize that that makes all the difference in the world. I look at the geeky kids and teens that i know and i realized that one of the major things that sets them apart from everyone else is that instead of doing something they do nothing. Even if they did something and made a fool of themselves it would have been better than if they had done nothing. Living life hesitating instead of doing makes all the difference in the world. That's the difference between the geek and the cool kid.

Image from Samuel Rönnqvist used under cc license.

Do We Invest it, or Do We Spend it?

How much of what we do in our lives is nothing more than extraneous crap? How much time do we spend just doing things for the sake of doing them and because we don't really have to put any effort into them, but that don't really do anything with any lasting significance? What happens when our jobs are there only to pay the bills? Do we create ways to have significance in other areas of our lives, or do we come home, vedge out in front of the tv, eat dinner, and go to bed? Where is that extra time spent? Do we invest it, or do we spend it?

I know it's easy when the work/jobs of life have worn us out to just let go and turn our extra time into "me time". It's the end of the day, everything has piled up, and it doesn't seem like it really matters all that much. I've been there. I've done that. Everyone has done that. Most us us still do it (myself included). What i've found over the years is that when i do that... When i spend my time just as "me time" i tend to get grumpy and easily irritated. I spend that time doing things that i know are pointless and useless, and my attitude shows it. When i turn around and instead invest that time in other people and other situations, i tend to have a much clearer and hopeful attitude about life. That time invested no longer seems like time wasted, and life has much more of a purpose.

Of course that in turn creates other problems like the pointless mediocrity of a purposeless job becomes that much more difficult when it is no longer surrounded by more pointless mediocrity. I guess you just can't win for losing. I so can't wait to get back into a job that actually has a purpose.

Image from Bright Meadow used under cc license.

The Desires of Our Hearts

One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." When i was younger i read that verse and thought that it meant that if i seek the Lord, He will give me what i want. I still think in reality many times that is true. When we delight ourselves in God many times he gives us the things we desire. What i came to realize quite some time ago is that this idea/concept has nothing to do with this verse. I don't know if this was something that i heard from a pastor's teaching, or if it was something that God showed to me in my daily time. This realization that changed my whole outlook... my whole way of thinking is that this desire of our hearts is not the completion of a physical desire, but rather the passion of our lives. Think about it for a minute..........

This isn't a promise that i will get what i want. In fact contrary to that, we may never see this desire fulfilled in our lifetime. It isn't a promise of completion. It is a promise of desire. It is a promise that when we delight ourselves in the Lord, He will give us a desire or desires for our lives. We will have a passion and a purpose for our lives above and beyond ourselves. That passion may be to reach out to those in desperate need. It may be to help the homeless. It may be to bring hope to those whose lives are falling apart. It may be to help a person or ministry grow and succeed. It may be any of these things or more... more than you or i could ever imagine. That is the promise of Psalm 37:4. When we delight ourselves in the Lord, He will put in us a passion and a desire that is beyond anything we can do alone. He gives our heart a passion and desire that exceeds us. We go from a lifeless robot to a person with a passion.

Working off of that thought. How many of us have really had a passion and a desire for our lives? How many lose or have lost that passion over the years? How many of us right now are not doing anything in our lives to fulfill or complete that desire? It amazes me to see how often i have gotten so wrapped up in doing everything that i was supposed to do that i lost grip of the passion and desire that defines (or should be defining) me. Living the right life interferes with fulfilling that passion and desire. Oftentimes when i seek what is "best" i just end up with the rest. Why? Because so often what we think of as being "the best" is nothing more than a fading desire. It is a lost cause that has no lasting purpose. Because so often what we seek in our daily lives is contrary to God and the passion that He is giving/has given to us. We lose sight of this passion and end up only being part of the person God has created us to be.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

The more i look at the world, the more i shake my head wondering what has happened. I started to notice it in high-school. I was walking down the hallway between classes and there was a group kids around fourth grade going down the hallway. Suddenly, it seemed like out of the blue, one of the younger kids starts making fun of one of high-schooler. I mean he just starts reaming on him, swearing at him, insulting him, and going on & on. From as far as i could tell the fourth grader wasn't mad at the other guy. He was just saying what he was because he knew he could get away with it, and getting away with it he was. The high-schooler starts acting like he's going to pummel the fourth grader and the fourth grader tells him that he's not afraid of him and that if he touches him he will sue him. The kid's teacher was nowhere to be seen, and no other staff member was even paying attention, let alone cared. I couldn't believe the gall of this kid. At around that age, no one i knew in school would have even considered doing that.

It amazes me how much times have changed. When i was a kid we called all adults by their titles Mr. & Mrs. There was no first name basis. (Mind you, i am only in my twenties. This wasn't something that occurred 50 years ago) There was respect because as adults they deserved respect. They were our authority figures and we were raised to have respect for authority. Nowadays that means little to nothing. Parents and other adults tend to be on a first name basis with their kids friends. If a child is disrespectful to someone in public people tend to shrug it off and say not to worry about it because they are just kids. I have seen where an adult chastised their child for being disrespectful to someone else and the other person got mad and chastised the parent for getting upset with their child.

It almost seems like any kind of respect besides self-respect is seen an inappropriate and unfounded. Lack of respect or even disrespect is status quo unless that respect has been earned. How about the fact that not only is the person older than you (or me) and has been through more things in life than us, but that they also have to put up with our crap. I'd say that that is more than deserving of respect.

This issue falls into even more of a problem because we (including the pastors and other church leaders) don't seem to have/act out respect for God during prayer. How many times have you seen a pastor or leader praying over or with a congregation and everyone has their heads bowed and is either reverently silent or is praying as well. I'm sure that a number of you who read this will say, "Sure, it happens every week at my church". But, what about the worship team? While someone is praying, they are getting onto and off of the stage. They are getting setup or they are tearing down. Why? So that everything can flow seamlessly? So that we have the best quality show? So that all that the audience(, i mean "congregation") sees is the best? Since when is it more important to put on a good "show" than to have respect for the creator of the universe? Why is the congregations view more important than respect for the one who has taken us from our own desire for selfish darkness into the light? How can we expect our children to be respectful of those in authority when it seems like we don't have the respect we should have for the ultimate authority, God?

(I do apologize for picking on the worship team. This is something that i see throughout the entire church body and not just in this situation. It's just an easy example that crosses congregational and denominational boundaries due to its commonality.)

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The HIV Connection

A bunch of years back i came to the understanding that i have stated here previously. Everything is connected to everything else. The physical to the emotional to the spiritual to the intellectual. Everything is interconnected. As i was thinking about this interconnection in my prayer and devotional time i came across a correlation that really shocked me. The more i thought about it, the more it made sense and came together.

Bear with me as i try to explain and piece this together. It's a simple concept really, just not easily explained. (Keep in mind, this explanation of AIDS is merely a simplified explanation of something very complex. You might say that it is the dumbed down high-school version [ddhv].) AIDS (Auto-Immune Deficiency Syndrome) seems to be a really hot topic nowadays. The AIDS epidemic in Africa. AIDS rate rising in the US. However, as much as AIDS kills people, AIDS in and of itself is merely a symptom of HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus). How HIV works (ddhv) is that the virus infects a person and begins to reproduce. It imitates our bodies white blood cells (our body's natural defense system) to such a degree that the white blood cells can't distinguish the virus from other white blood cells. The virus then infects the white blood cells using them as a host to reproduce while destroying that white blood cell in the process. Thereby they successfully and effectively imitate and destroy our body's immune system without the immune system being able to fight back. Thus it destroys our defense against other diseases faster than our bone marrow can produce more. Without that defense system in place our body becomes more susceptible to other forms of disease. Our bodies become unable to fight complex or over time even simple sickness. Thus without our white blood-cell count up to par a person can be killed by a simple common cold that an ordinarily healthy person would have beaten in a matter of a day or two.

The same thing happens to us intellectually & spiritually. Our morals, principles, and values protect us. They help to define who we are, and they keep us healthy. They help us to fend off invading sin and corruption in our lives that would work as disease corrupting and destroying us. They act as our spiritual white blood cells. The stronger and better they are, the better they work at keeping us healthy. Their source is the truth. The truth is the foundation of our morals, principles, and values. Truth is like the bone marrow that produces and stabilizes our spiritual white blood cells. Relative truth states that there is no real truth. It states that truth is dependent upon circumstances not any real source. Relative truth acts as though it is truth only instead of producing healthy morals it destroys them. It states that truth is dependent upon the circumstances around it and has no definite source or value in itself. Thus truth and the values, principles, and morals that it produces are merely a representation of ourselves and thus can be whatever our society as a whole or we as individuals decide it to be. Thus truth becomes a slave to our desires and our actions follow suit. Thus our desires become the driving force in our lives.

Thereby relative truth imitates truth and then turns around and destroys it from the inside out. When we embrace the concept that truth is relative and doesn't really exist the only thing that stops us from destroying ourselves and others is fear of retribution. So a person with nothing to fear or nothing to lose becomes a person intent upon destroying themselves and others.

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Good & Evil, Black & White, Hot & Cold

It's interesting to me how i hear people talk about good and evil. Our society & the media seem to see good and evil as diametrically opposed forces. As if it is a battle between God and the devil. Black vs. white. Hot vs Cold. Two equally ranked brute titans battling for the ages and whoever is stronger wins. What is interesting to me is that in many ways they have it right without ever realizing how wrong they are.

When attempting to describe good and evil as in comparison to black & white and hot & cold the analogy is very strong and correlates very well. What is interesting about these analogies is that black and white are not two diametrically opposed forces. For example, when you are in a dark room and you can't see, what do you do? You turn on the light. When it is bright out and you need it a little darker in the room what do you do? You turn on the dark, right? Even my two and three year old know that that's not the case. You don't turn on the dark, you turn off the light or close the shades so that the light doesn't get in. Black is not something you can turn on or off. It exists where light does not. There is no dark battling light there is only light or lack of light. Where light exists darkness flees. There even comes a point where there is no more light when it is pitch black. It cannot get any darker because it is the point at which there is no light at all.

The same thing works for hot and cold. What is the formula to make water into ice? It is H2O - h (water minus heat). It's not water plus cold because just like with light cold is simply the lack of heat. When you attempt to cool yourself down with ice what you are actually doing is dissipating the heat. There is such a vacuum of heat in the ice that when it comes into contact with your skin the heat in your skin dissolves into the ice. You feel cooler due to that heat leaving you, and that ice-cube melts due to your body heat entering and warming that ice cube. This can be a bit of a confusing concept at times, so maybe i should go at this a different way. Heat and cold are relative to each other right. Something feels cold because it has less heat than something else. Fifty-two degrees Fahrenheit to someone from Alaska is warm, maybe even hot. Fifty-two degrees Fahrenheit to someone from the Caribbean islands may feel extremely cold. However, there comes a point at which something cannot get any colder. Absolute Zero is the term for the temperature at which no heat exists. It is impossible to get any colder than that. However, heat can keep increasing indefinitely. There is no known hottest temperature.

So in essence there is no such thing as black & white or hot & cold. There is only light & lack of light (or less light). Heat & lack of heat (or less heat). The same thing applies to God. There is no good & evil. Evil is merely a corruption of good. It is the lack of God. Thus there is only God & lack of God (less God). Of course this is still not a perfect analogy because unlike with black & white and hot & cold there is no such thing as an absolute zero with God. He exists everywhere. He cannot, not be. So there cannot ever be No God, there can only be attempts to block him out like shades blocking the light on a very bright day. Thus the argument is not God vs. Satan or good vs. evil, but rather God vs. less of God.

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The Vase

One day a mother entered an antique store with her young son. She was looking for a gift for a friend and she knew that this shop owner would have it or know where she could find it. As she was talking with the owner her son starts to cry. They go over to investigate what the problem is. When she finds her son he is standing with his hand stuck in an ancient oriental vase. This vase is obviously a prized piece, part of the antique dealer's collection on display and not for sale. So the embarrassed mother tries very hard to get her son's hand out of the vase. Unfortunately, it won't come out. The shop owner recommends that they try some butter. So they try to put the butter on the child's hand to overcome the resistance. Unfortunately that does not solve the problem. By this time the plight of the troubled young boy has garnered the attention of numerous shoppers and people passing by. Everyone seems to have an idea as to how to help get the boys hand out. Oil, a shoe horn, warm water, none of it seems to work. As time goes by the plight garners the attention of a local news station. Eventually, there becomes no other solution than to destroy this priceless antique vase. The rather upset shop owner insists on doing it himself. If the prized piece in his collection must be destroyed, he is going to be the one to do it. Smash! The vase is destroyed and to the mother's relief, her son's hand is free. With tears still rolling down his cheeks and a huge grin on his face, the little boy triumphantly raises up his little fist and opens his hand to proudly show his mother his treasure ... a single penny!

How many times are you and i this little boy? We are so insistent on getting what we want and it doesn't matter what it takes to get it. We are going to grab onto what we want and not let go. In the mean time our insistence on not letting go of something small and insignificant means that we destroy something of great value. That penny can be our ego. It can be a new outfit or large screen tv. It can be a grudge. It can be a relationship with a girl or a guy. It can be a job or a position. We want what we want and we will not let go no matter what. As a result we destroy something priceless and beautiful. A marriage, a church, a company, a future, sacrificed on the alter of self-satisfaction. Is there something in my life that i am refusing to let go of?

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... Warts and All

This is part 2. Please see "Let's Talk About (More Than Just) Sex Baby" for part 1. In part 1 we were talking about how we as people are made up of interconnected parts or facets. When there is a problem with one aspect of our lives it affects the others as well. We were relating that to relationships and how we tend to (as a church) focus on the unhealthy physical aspects of a relationship. However, it goes far beyond the physical.

When we are involved in serious relationship after serious relationship it tends to tear us apart on numerous levels. Our sexuality becomes disjointed and disfigured, but so does our emotional focus. Sex takes 2 people producing 1 flesh. When that sexual bond is broken with multiple sexual partners, we permanently lose a part of ourselves and gain a part of that other person. The more people we are involved with sexually, the less we are ourselves. The same thing happens emotionally. When we build an emotional bond with another person in that intimate of a setting we tend to give that person a part of ourselves and they to us. It is a bond that never really fully dissolves. We carry a piece of that person around with us for the rest of our lives, and no matter how hard we try to dislodge that aspect of that other person, it remains. When a person has had numerous emotional partners, building that emotional bond through time attention and giving of one another at deep emotional levels, we tend to remain emotionally connected to them long after the relationship has ended. We permanently gain a part of that person and lose a part of ourselves.

Many people call this "emotional baggage", which is a pretty accurate description. Many times therapists are hired to help a person "remove" this "baggage", but the reality is that this is baggage that cannot be removed. It is a cyst or wart that is permanently attached to you. What a counselor helps you to do is to minimize the negative impact this permanent growth has on your life. When we have time and time again given ourselves emotionally to another person we end up with an emotional life that is so wart encased that we cannot emotionally connect with anyone in any real way. We create for ourselves an emotional armor that cannot be penetrated even by a healthy and constructive relationship. We become a knight in armor. However, that armor is used to keep people out instead of being used to rescue people in distress, and it certainly is not shining armor.

Being involved in relationship after relationship slowly tears us apart not only physically and emotionally as has been stated here, but also mentally and spiritually as well. Nothing that we do affects only part of us. Every aspect of ourselves is interconnected to one another and nothing that we do only affects one part of us.

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Let's Talk About (More Than Just) Sex Baby

The Youth Pastor (and interim Head Pastor) at our church began a series this week with the Sr. High youth about dating. He had some really good material to work with and i will have to get a copy of his notes. They cover many of the same concepts and topics i would have covered but with a little bit of a better structure. When he was speaking it reminded me of some things... some cultural & church views that seem to be focused on at the expense of others. So i wanted to touch a little bit on some issues that i think most people, pastors as well as lay people tend to miss or forget.

One thing for instance is the concept of physical intimacy. It seems like whenever pastors or churches talk about dating and relationships we tend to focus on the unhealthy nature of physical intimacy. Sex, to be more precise. This is a hot topic in the Christian world. Sex outside of marriage is condemned in the Bible. It is rejected and it's clear why. Scientific research and other types of research back up how unhealthy it is to have numerous sexual partners on both the individual, the community, and the church. This is all very important, but sometimes we tend to get so focused on the sexual issues that we miss many of the others.

We as human beings are comprised of numerous interconnected "parts" (for lack of a better word right now "facets" may be better). We are physical (see, smell, hear, touch, & taste). We are emotional (happy, sad, upset, angry, excited, etc). We are cognitive (thought processes, plans, vision, ideas, concepts), and we are spiritual (our connection to God and what is around us that is beyond what fits into our ability to perceive otherwise). Every one of these facets is connected to one another. Something that affects one of these facets, one of these parts, affects the others. When someone is physically sick, it effects them emotionally, cognitively, as well as spiritually. The reality is that that physical sickness may only be a symptom of a problem in one of the other areas. At the same time, when we are involved in unhealthy behavior, sin, we hurt ourselves in every area of our lives.

Thus every facet of our being is affected by healthy as well as unhealthy relationships. When we go beyond what we are designed for and attempt to break the mold... the borders and limitations of what is designed to keep us in,whole, and complete... it doesn't just affect us in one area, it affects us in all areas and that's something we as a church tend to miss... to be continued...

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Worship & Prayer

There is so much about prayer that i don't understand at times. Then there are other times that pieces begin to fit together that didn't fit before. For instance the connection between prayer and worship. Years ago when i was in high school Scott Laird, the worship leader at my church, made a comment about how they were connected. He mentioned how many times when we worship God we are attracted to the worship by the beat, the rhythm, and the tune. However we speak the words even when we don't pay attention to what those words are saying. Part of Scott's point was that we need to pay attention to the words of what we are singing to make sure that what we are saying is correct and Biblical. The other point that he made is that when we sing something, just because we aren't paying attention doesn't mean that God isn't. He takes it seriously and will act on what we say. There are times when things come up in our lives that we are dumbfounded about. We have no idea what's going on, but when we ask God about it saying that we never wanted this, He reminds us that we most certainly did. When we sang that we were laying it all down, or that we are giving it all to Him, or that we want more of Him, even though we may have seen it more as just a song, He sees it just as it is. A message to Him. A prayer. A promise. When we sing something, there is so much more to it than just a song, and we fail to see that many times.

This past weekend i was thinking about worship and music and the structure of that worship. I was thinking about the structure of the a worship song. The main focus / basis / core / center of the worship is in the chorus. It defines the direction and movement of the whole song. Meanwhile, the verses work off of the chorus to define it more and give it substance and definition. The chorus acts as the trunk of the tree and the verses are the branches. The verses expand / expound as the chorus leads.

As i was thinking about that structure of worship as well as the parallel between worship and prayer, i realized that in the struggles that i have with praying, that structure may be a big benefit. If instead of jumping from one thing to another in my prayer i can have one focus that i start with and then define and expound upon it in "verses". Thereby my attention is less likely to drift into completely off areas. I am more likely to stay on task and focused, and the prayer itself becomes more... (i can't think of the right way to finish this) complete, purposeful, structured, beneficial...

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Something so Simple!

It's a funny thing about prayer. My undergraduate work was in Bible and Youth Ministry. While i was in Bible college i got myself into this habit of getting up an extra hour and a half to two and a half hours early to pray. Most everyone else was still asleep, but i was up in the prayer room studying, praying, and worshiping. Going to bed early and a well needed nap were necessary at the time in order to make it happen, but they were doable. Since then i have not been as faithful. I still get up early to try to spend the time, but it's not nearly as much.

I'm not trying to toot my own horn or to say that i'm this great guy or anything because i'm not. What i do want to do is that when i say what i'm going to say i want it to be clear the impact of this. I have a very difficult time praying. I struggle with it in so many ways it's difficult to imagine it as anything but a struggle. I can't stay awake. When i am awake i have such a hard time staying focused i may as well not be praying. When i am in public in front of people i can pray in ways i could only wish that i could in private. You would think (at least i know i would think) that after 15 years of (usually) daily prayer, praise, and Bible reading and 3 years of Bible college, that someone would be able to at least pray. Yet for me, day in and day out it is the most difficult things that i do in the day.

It's difficult because, if i pray out loud i'm likely to wake up the girls. If i pray quietly i get distracted and lose focus. If i kneel down to pray i fall asleep. If i sit everything else going on in my head distracts me. If i stand up everything around me distracts me. It's like i'm fighting a battle with the wind, and the wind keeps winning. Yet this should not be such a struggle. You would think that something so simple as prayer would be... well simple! So much for that idea.

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Feeding the Child, Not the Adult

How much are Jr. High youth able to handle? Do we give them credit where credit is due? We have been working on a series with the Jr. High youth that talks about what God is like. Each week we look at another facet of God's personality and the kinds of things He is or does. For instance we talked about how God is an inventor, a rescue worker, a servant, etc. Each week we do different activities that focus on what this means and that it is important to do these kinds of things ourselves.

The further we go into the series the more i realize how little substance there is in it. For instance this week i am leading and the for the topic there are two verses used for support. Neither verse is even considered in context, and one of them is actually taken almost completely out of context. It seems like the series is dumbed down to it's simplest possible elements and then bottle fed to someone who has been bottle fed all their lives. To me, it's no wonder Jr. High youth don't practice what they learn, they've heard the same thing for 11 years. It goes in one ear and out the other.

Quite honestly, i think that this is not just a problem in the Sunday School series we are using right now. I think that this is just an example of how we (as a nation and society) view our youth. They have the ability to do and be so much, but they are not challenged. They are relegated to the title of kid. Looked on and treated as kids, they are expected to act that way and as a result, they do. Meanwhile their untapped potential exceeds the bounds of our imagination. So what do we do now?

Rush Hour Prime Time

Our (western, first world country) world is in such a rush. People running here and there. A thousand things have to get done in the day, and when the day is done there are a hundred other things that we want to do. We plunge onto the couch to watch tv. We sit down at the computer to read and surf the net. We IM each other to stay in touch. Everything is about staying busy doing things.

That's not to say that doing things is necessarily a bad thing. The issue isn't so much that the things that we do are not so good so much as that we are currently in a society and mentality in which we have surrounded ourselves with so much that we need to do that we don't even have the time to sit back and think. Our lives and society are in such a state of motion that we can't be at rest. Even when we are at rest we are actively doing something. There have been times when just about every one of us have come home from work or whatever has been going on and just sat down in front of the TV and mindlessly watched TV. It was not because there was necessarily something that we want to see, but because we wanted something to do and TV was better than nothing.

Many times we would rather watch nothing worth watching or keep busy doing unnecessary tasks rather than be alone with our thoughts. It's easier to fill our heads with pointless, unhealthy, and sometimes destructive views than to stop and pay attention to what's going in our own heads. At times for me that is a good thing. I can't always trust where my mind will go if i let it wander. At the same time i tend to miss out on so much when i'm completely focused on things and everyday life. It is my alone time, my time just focused and meditating on God and His word that brings peace and much needed rest. It is during the quiet times and the times that i'm not doing a hundred things at once that i can focus on God and what He has to tell me. It's at these times that God speaks and i get a completely new view of what is significant and important.

I think that that's why our world is so focused on keeping busy. The enemy knows that when we are too busy being busy we don't have time to reflect on God or our own issues. We become tired, we can't stay focused, we become overwhelmed, and the cycle repeats itself.

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"As Long as it Doesn't Hurt Anyone Else..."

One of the problems that comes with our focus on and demand for individuality, self-reliance, and independence is that every decision that we makes affects not only us, but everyone around us. We are not an island in and of ourselves. We are not self-sustaining nor are we simply self-affecting. It's easy for us to look at our lives and our world and try to convince ourselves that we are only responsible for our own actions. Our mentality becomes one in which it doesn't matter that i do what i know is not right it only affects me. As long as it isn't hurting anyone else i can do what i want.

This is a concept that really frustrates me and gets me upset. It very much reminds me of the the Beatles song "All You Need is Love". That song practically became a motto for a generation. It's a beautiful concept that brings lots of warm fuzzies. People applied it to their lives, their marriages, how they raised their kids, etc. In the end living by that motto and mentality destroys us. Love is a whole lot more complex than an emotional reaction. Love (the way our world sees it) in itself does not and can not sustain anything. Our love fails, and when our lives are built on this concept, they collapse as well.

The same concept is true of this mentality of being able to do what we want as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. It is becoming the motto of a generation, unfortunately it is even more destructive than the last. The reality is that there is nothing that we do that does not affect those around us. Everything that we do affects and defines us. Our hidden thoughts and actions are the seeds of our lives. A person who in their alone time sits down and looks at inappropriate pictures and watches raunchy videos is going to have a very difficult time having a healthy relationship. As is a person who sits and reads books and watches tv shows and movies in which the relationships are scripted to draw out our emotional reactions and have no real resemblance to what a healthy relationship should or does look like. These things develop in us views and mentalities of who we are, who others are, and what a relationship is that in turn create cracks and weak areas in us which ultimately destroy us our relationships and those around us. Yet the view is that as long is it is not hurting anyone else, it's all right.

I think that what surprises me the most (or maybe it doesn't) is that there are people out there that actually believe this concept. It doesn't take a philosopher or a theologian to recognize the problems with this view. All it takes is a 12 year old with two minutes of dwelling on it to to put more holes in it than swiss cheese. Yet time and time again we either knowingly ignore the holes to our own destruction, or we don't even take the two minutes needed to recognize that there is a problem with the very philosophy and foundation that our lives are based on. Then somehow we are either surprised that our lives are falling apart, or we think that that is the way it is supposed to be.

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Independence, Self-Reliance, & Individuality

One of the hallmarks of our society is the mentality of independence, self-reliance, and individuality. The focus is on standing out and being yourself. "Be faithful to yourself" It's what we are taught in school. It's what we see in life. It's a major focus in our society. Make what is around you fit your personality and style. Is there necessarily anything wrong with these concepts? Yes and No. For instance, our society embraces the ideas, concepts, and values of independence, self-reliance, and individuality. What's wrong with these concepts? The problem is that they come at the cost of family, community, dependence, and cooperation. They instill in us the values of pride & self-centeredness, inability to rely on or trust others, and a focus on success at the cost of everything else. Is that really the kind of life and lifestyle that we want? Is that what we want bred into ourselves, our society, and our children? Unfortunately, too often that is where we are and what we are teaching and learning.

Everything that we learn and do is based off of not learning and doing something else. We continually have to make choices in our lives and every decision that we make affects our lives. Everything we do comes at a cost. The cost can be that of other choices. The cost can be that of having to live with the consequences of our own decisions. Or the cost can be that of having to learn to survive dealing with decisions that are out of our control. Something that we, as a society, are often none too pleased with.

What is the Cost of Technology?

There are so many things that we have lost with the advance of technology in our modern and post-modern age. So many things that are key to our success and survival. Our views and mentalities have changed, and as a result we are slowly losing parts of ourselves. There is so much of who we are that is linked to the past. Yet the past is being discarded in the face of the future.

So many times technology embraces the new at the cost of the proven. How many people's lives are easier as a result of the advances in technology? It seems to me that instead of our lives becoming better, technology has simply made our lives faster. Instead of it giving us more free time, technology has required us to get more done. It has made it so that we invest more in doing and less in becoming.

"When we sacrifice on the alter of technology we gain productivity but it comes at a price. What is that price, and is it worth it?"

What do you think?

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Where is This Train Going?

"Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
Proverbs 22:6

How are we training our children? What do we want our children to become? It's funny, because many times we send our kids off to school to be raised and trained by other people. We may see them in the evening when they come home from school and we get home from work, and at that point we as adults are usually too tired from the day to interact with them in a healthy way. Many times our weekends are spent getting things done that need to get done around the house while our kids are doing their own thing. So how are we training them? They learn from us what they see us doing. If we are too focused on our own problems and issues, that is what they will see as the right way of handling things. If we spend all of our time working on take home from our jobs what does that teach them? Who and what are we training our children to become and at what cost to them? How are we training our children and what exactly are they learning from us?

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Vision to ... a Jumbled Mess

There are so many things that can be done. There are so many things that need to be done. There is so much work that my mind gets lost just thinking about what is needed to even start (not that it's difficult for my mind to get lost or anything). The obvious starting point is with myself and my own family, but what next. My wife and i are getting more involved with the youth group in our church, and that's a good start. If we want to change the world, it starts with the youth. Also, one of the things that i want to do is to write a book. I have started this many times, but cannot come up with a set vision and direction for that book. Right now it's all a jumble of facts, concepts, and images. It's easy to lose focus on what the reality is and where we need to go, but that is key to success. If we don't understand the endpoint we can't reach that endpoint. In order to bring about change on a large scale it requires the involvement of many people working together. One person cannot do it alone. So refining & spreading the vision is a key to external change. Of course that also requires understanding your own vision. After all, how can we explain what we don't necessarily understand ourselves? So what are some of the keys to this change? Well since the problem is that youth are not trained to be and act like adults, than that needs to be a starting point as well. Boy, my mind is a jumbled mess. Everything here is valid and valuable, but without direction and action, it is nothing more than a jumbled mess.

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Vision to Reality - Facing the Giant

So now what? This is the difficult part. I see and for the most part understand the problem. That's the easy part. It's what to do next that is the difficult part. The problem exists on so many levels in our society that it is nigh impossible to tackle it all. It deals with institutions and views that are ingrained into our society and that have been a part of this culture and environment for over a century. How do you break the backbone of a century's old view and mentality that pervades an entire culture, society, and world? How do you tackle something that is so far encompassing that it invades us in every area that we live? It is defined in how we work, what we do in our "spare" time, how we live, how & what we eat, what we teach our kids, how our kids learn, our own expectations, what we see and invades our home. How does one even pretend to tackle this problem without being destroyed by it?

There are individuals, families, and even entire communities that have seen these problems for a long time and instead of fighting it have separated themselves from the problem and the society that it pervades. At times they have become outsiders looking in critically and rejecting our society as a whole, or they just don't even care and would rather be their own entity and allow the rest of society slowly destroy itself while they go on living their own lives. I can understand it, and in a way it is a very awe inspiring view to see the battle against the onslaught of outside forces. However, it does so little to actually create the change that needs to occur.

So how do you fight a battle that is so much larger than yourself that you can't even see & comprehend the vastness of it? How do you fell a giant that encompasses a planet in the face of a people that doesn't even recognize that the giant exists, that may only see a finger or toe of the giant and attempts to fight only that part, or that don't even understand that the giant is a problem? The answer is that one person alone can't... but then we never really are alone, are we?
II Kings 6:1-23 especially vs. 16 "And he answered, Do not fear, for those with us are more than those with them."

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Redefining the Vision

It's nice to not be feeling miserable all the time. Now i just need to get past the complete exhaustion phase and the massively stressed out one. Anyways, that's neither here nor there.
I think it's time to reiterate and refine my vision, and to look at what i am doing and needing to do to bring that vision to fruition.

What is my vision? My vision is to have youth and young adults prepared for adulthood, trained to be adults and able to handle healthy relationships with their peers and those of the opposite sex. To mature and grow in their relationship with God as well as to become leaders and successful as people.
So, what does that mean? That's a good question. I'm glad that you asked. It means.............. Um, could you repeat the question please? Oh, yeah. What it means is that we need to prepare youth to be adults. Instead of just expecting that one day youth will be adults and will act like adults when they mature enough, we need to be helping them prepare and grow into adulthood. Unless youth are trained and expected to act like adults, chances are they are not going to.
Where has this vision come from? Our society has created this idea, this concept, that youth are kids and not adults. They are not supposed to act like or become adults until they are at least 21. The time between 17 or 18 and 21 is the ramp up stage in which they put their childish ways behind them and prepare for the real world. Prior to that is the adolescent stage in which youth rebel against authority and begin to become their own person. Adolescence is a troublesome time in which youth begin to "find themselves" and define who they are by standing against authority. The problem that i see is that these are modern and very unhealthy concepts. Traditionally, prior to the industrial revolution and the modern educational system, children were raised to become adults. When they were young, children were expected to help out and be involved where they could. As they grew they were given more and more responsibility until they were around the age of puberty (much older than puberty hits now, usually around 15-18). At that time they went through a rite of passage and became adults. As adults they were expected to act like adults, and to be able to provide and take care of a family. Which, with some help from family and the community, they could do since they spent their lives training and preparing for it. Now, however, even after 12+ years of "formal" education and many times 4 years of post high-school education, young adults still don't know how to be adults and take care of and provide for their families.
So, what now? That's a good question that i don't have enough time to get into right now. Check back tomorrow when i want to deal with plans, purposes, and steps to take.

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Great Expectations

So, how do we develop growth and maturity in young adults? How do we nurture it and encourage it? I don't think that there is an easy answer to these questions. It's like asking a salesman how to sell something to someone. You could ask 100 different salesmen and get 100 different answers. Ultimately the core of the issue is that when a young person is encouraged to act immaturely, chances are, they will. It's like trying to teach a 3-year old how to behave. If you model, encourage, and reward good behavior, chances are you will have children that have good behavior.

When a young adult see another person acting like a mature, responsible adult putting what's best ahead of what they necessarily want, chances are they will learn from that. If a young adult sees themself as the only person that they know acting the right way, they will be more likely to become frustrated and discouraged and more likely to give up on the process. One of the key things to remember is that if a young adult is expected to act like an adult and treated like an adult they will be more willing to be that way. However if they don't know what that looks like, expectations won't mean a thing.

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What does it take?

What does it take for a person, a group of people to grow and mature? When i look at our youth today i can see that many times a young adult can act mature and grow to become a healthy adult in an environment that is less than healthy. In these situations there are a couple of things that build this support, 1) people that stand in the gap, 2) their willingness to be that mature person, and 3) their relationship to God.

It is important when attempting to develop change that there is something or someone standing beside or behind this person. No one can really grow and mature alone. If we don't see or know what it means to grow and be a part of something bigger than ourselves chances are, we may not. And, we can't reach bigger and higher than ourselves without help from other people. Just as we need to be a strength and support to others. A lone tree standing against the wind will not stand for long or very well when the winds get rough. When there is a group of trees standing together, the wind cannot blow them down so easily.

If someone is not willing to be that strong person, that mature person, chances are pretty good that they aren't going to become that person. That's not to say that an unwilling person isn't going to or can't become a strong, healthy, and mature person, but chances are until they see the need to change, they are not going to change. The need and desire for change can come from within or without. Circumstances and situations can lead the change. They can be the spark that lights the fire and gets the blaze going. It can also be the fan that helps and encourages the flame to spread. However, what is really needed is the desire and need to change coming from within. A spark from outside is not going to do much with the fuel that's inside. A group of people can push, pull, and drag a person into position of maturity, but it's not going to mean much if they are an unwilling protagonist.

Lastly, and by far the most important, is our need and search for God. When our plans are, well exactly that, our plans, they only get a part of the picture. When our source is much larger than ourselves, and we tap into that source, our plans are a part of His plans and become more than we can ever imagine. If we are relying on our own imagination and ideas we are limiting our potential. God is the source of all creativity, maturity, and strength. He gives it to us when we have nothing to give. He is the source and the great director. Ultimately it is His masterpiece and we are only the work and progress.

Something to keep in mind. All three of these things are not required. A single person can do a great deal on their own. An unwilling host can become the source of great change. And God does not necessarily need us to recognize Him for Him to work through us. All three of these things together have to potential to produce maturity, growth, and much needed change.

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Frustrations and Distractions

It's so easy to get distracted in who we are that we lose focus on who God is and who He wants us to be. It's easy to get caught up in the things that are frustrating and distracting, the things that suck our attention and we lose focus on the things that really need our attention. It becomes, "what will make me feel better?", "what do i want?", or even "what am i supposed to do?" rather than, "Who are You God, and what are you looking for?". The only way to really know God, and to know the plan for our lives is to get to know Him. Spend time with Him reading the word, praying, seeking to understand Him. He reveals Himself to those who diligently seek Him, and to those called according to His purpose. So what are we doing to know Him more?

What is Faithfulness?

So what is so special about faithfulness? I have been really mulling this over in my mind for the last few days or so. I have come to realize that faithfulness is something existent in all people. Everyone is faithful to something or someone. Even those of us that we would call unfaithful are faithful to something; whether it be our emotional desires at the time, our selfish wants, or what our best friend wants, we are faithful to something. The question then becomes, what or who are we faithful to? Are we faithful to ourselves? Are we faithful to our feelings? Are we faithful to our friends? Are we faithful to God? Who or what are we faithful to?

I think in working with the young adults and the lesson for this week i will be focusing on helping them to 1) identify examples of faithfulness & unfaithfulness, 2) understand what fruit and faithfulness really are, 4) understand where fruit comes from and how it comes to be and 3) apply it. What ways are we faithful? How do we become faithful to the right things? What are three things that i can do today to be more faithful to the right things?

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Help & Hindurance

I have been working on a lesson for the Jr. High youth this past week. I am finding that curriculum's over all to me tend to be more limiting than necessarily helpful. They have some good ideas for games and such, but when it comes to the lesson, especially in this one we are using right now, it tends to be a little simple minded and milk minded rather than meat minded. It's the kind of lesson i would expect from or for a pre-school and elementary level youth, or for someone who is brand new as a Christian. Not necessarily what is appropriate or best for those in the stages of becoming young adults.

The lesson that i was given for this week talks about the part of the fruit of the Spirit that is faithfulness. As soon as i was assigned to this topic, in my mind i put some ideas together as to what i wanted to touch on. When i read the lesson in the book my reaction was that half of the youth could do this lesson from years of experience in Sunday School. It's a simple concept, Christ is faithful. He is faithful to us as evidenced by scripture. Don't get me wrong. It is a very true and real concept, but at this stage in their life, the youth should be working on applying and bringing these concepts into fruition not just learning that Christ is faithful. If anything, at this age the young adults should already know how to do this and be teaching others to do the same. Yet the core of this lesson is; Christ is faithful, so what does that mean to you?

I guess that this bugs me because it simply reinforces this concept that Jr. High youth are nothing more than bigger kids. Sure they act like little kids quite a bit, but they have so much untapped potential that with a little bit of hard work and effort, they could easily become spiritual powerhouses... well, maybe not necessarily "easily" since becoming a spiritual powerhouse is far from easy, but you get my drift. If they are not trained at a young age to become powerhouses, chances are they may not reach that potential. I guess that this kind of thing just really frustrates me because i see it as being more of a hindrance than a help.

The Other Side

I think i'm beginning to understand things on a completely different level. I don't really like my job a whole lot. I basically work the job to pay the bills and have the insurance so that i can come home, spend some time with my family, work with the youth, etc. Last night, however, i began to see a little better how the other side lives. All my life i have spent in a Christian environment. My family growing up was involved in the church. I was always involved in the church. That continued on into my high-school and college years. There was a time that i rebelled and "turned away" from God, but i knew better. I knew that that was not going to work. My relationship and connection to God were too strong for a time of rebellion to really stick. It's like when you get really mad at the best friend you have had for years. You argue, you fight, but you are too heavily invested in each other that a stupid fight really can't destroy what you have built over the decades. So i have done the party scene, and the drama, and everything related to that before.

Last night however opened my eyes a little bit more. My work had a big celebration. We had reached a significant milestone that had taken a great deal of work and dedication by most everyone to achieve. So with a limited budget the management team put together a celebration. There was karaoke, hor d' ovures (i don't know how to spell it), and a pay bar. So my wife and i went. I'm never really that comfortable at these kinds of parties, but it was a chance to get away without the little ones which is nice sometimes. So the festivities began. Most everyone was drinking, hanging out and talking, and either singing or making a fool of themselves, or just watching it all.

I began to realize, "This is their life". So many of my co-workers work so that they can pay the bills and on the weekend get together with other coworkers and/or friends, go out to the bar and do exactly what everyone was doing last night. Get drunk, make fools of themselves, and complain about something or other. Others, instead of drinking, spend their weekends watching sports, getting lost in movies, whatever. This is the highlight of their week! There is no passion. There is no purpose. There is no direction or real desire... other than getting their weekend fix. It's no wonder everyone is always so miserable. Couple relationships have no solid foundation as a result they fall apart on a whim. Work, well work is just work. Depression is rampant. A big part of it is that for my coworkers, there is no real purpose other than to simply escape on the weekends. Where there is no vision the people perish. Where there is no purpose, there is no hope. There is only depression, escapism, and/or addiction.

I think i'm starting to understand a little bit better...

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