Should I Stay or Should I Go Now?

At this point, staying or going is not about choice. I was brought on under the expectation of church growth. Our church has not grown as expected and finances are a major issue. The powers at be have decided that due to the financial crisis and since they do not see the numbers growth that they expected in the youth group, the inevitable is now. Either way, our time here has ended.

However, how i go makes all the difference in the world. I have been given the option. They were going to just say that they let us go with financial and other issues being the reason. After seeking some wise counsel my lead pastor has given us (my wife and me) the choice. We could say that i resigned, or that i was let go. My head pastor is pushing for me to say that i resigned. He and others think that finding a new ("better fit") position is going to be much easier for us if we resign as opposed to are let go. I'm inclined to agree with that statement. We are most likely going to find that getting a new job in our field is going to be much easier if we go the easier road.

However, there is a whole lot more to it than just what will benefit us. We have been in this position for over a year. There have been issues with some of the youth throughout that time (not to be unexpected). But if we leave now by "choice", it sends a message to the youth that we think they aren't worth fighting for. It tells them that they are not important enough for us to not give up on them. Our youth group is small but appropriate to the size of the church. One of the key youth just lost his best friend (moved away). He has been having a very difficult time with the process, and his mood and mentality has definitely changed as a result. Another is a very depressed loner who already feels left out. My wife and i have been really trying to reach out to her and draw her in with some aspect of success. Another youth started out as a very shy loner who has since opened up and bloomed within the youth group. He absolutely loves us. There are others that we have had conflict with but that we have worked to try to make sure that they understand that we value them.

The last place we were, part of what we were doing was a Jr. High small group. That small group was a fun time and everyone enjoyed being there. Everyone liked/loved us, but it wasn't until we were there for over a year that they began to open up. They began to bring to us some of the stuff that was going on in their lives and families to pray for and help them process through. That post 12-16 month point was when everything changed. We went from a small group of teaching and advice giving to having the ability (and right) to speak into their lives and mentor them. When we left for our current position, it had a major effect on that group. That small group continued with another leader who is a friend of ours. She loves those youth as her own kids, however the dynamics of that group changed immensely after we left. Some of the students left and joined another small group, others left and never came back. We still attempt to connect sometimes with those youth, but that solid connection is now lost. One of our biggest regrets was that they were finally opening up, and we up and left them.

Now we have a group that is FULL of struggling students. Young people that are struggling with loss, rejection, trying to reach for acceptance, family issues, understanding who they are, and more. If we resign, we are sending the youth the message that "we gave up on you". "We're done with you". "We didn't think that you were worth fighting for". Even if we say something to them otherwise, our resigning still tells them, "It's been a difficult road for all of us, and we have better things to do than try to make this work". Quite frankly, that's the last thing this group needs.

Image from masukomi used under cc license.

One Little Thing... continued

Please be aware that this post is a continuation of the previous week's post.

In my mind there is no doubt that Adam recognized a difference in his wife when she offered him the fruit. One cannot go from a perfectly made human being to much, much less than that without it being clear as day. Sin creates a separation, a gap, a chasm between that which is holy and that which is not. As a result, Adam's choice to take the fruit was exactly that, a choice. He recognized that as a result of taking and eating the fruit there was something different about his wife. She had changed and not for the better. A major gap/chasm had formed between them, and he knew the source.
So i'm convinced that Adam went into eating this forbidden fruit well aware, much more aware than his wife, of the command as well as the consequences of his actions. He was not deceived into considering that the fruit was good for food. He could have cared less if it was pleasing to the eye. The desire to make one wise may have had some pull, but ultimately i believe that even that desire was overwhelmed by seeing the consequences of Eve's actions. So when Adam made the choice to take of the fruit he knowingly made the choice to turn away from God for the sake of his wife.
As a result, Eve's sin was a blind sin resulting in part from deception. Adam's sin, however, was a sin with open eyes. There was no deception. He recognized and made the choice to turn his back on God. He loved God dearly. God created him. God gave him everything he had and wanted, but he desired his wife and unity with his wife even more. So he placed his wife before God. He chose his spouse over his source. That which was created from him over He whom created him. The rest, as they say, is history.

Wow, i just realized what a comparison and contrast this incident and choice are to what happened to Abraham and Isaac when God tested Abraham; asking him to sacrifice his only son whom he loved.

Image from assbach used under cc license.

One Little Thing Can Make All the Difference in the World

"She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate."
Genesis 3:6

I really have to wonder what was going on in Adam's head when his wife Eve gave him the forbidden fruit. I have already commented about what the text states here; that Adam was with Eve at the time. When researching this word it appears that by Adam being "with" Eve he was in the very near vicinity if not right next to her at the time. Chances are pretty good that he knew what had happened long before she ever gave him the fruit, but then again he may not have. He may have been nearby and not privy to the conversation. Either way, when the fruit was given to Adam there is no doubt in my mind that he knew what that fruit was. It was the one thing that he had been forbidden from partaking in. It was the only thing that he knew and understood, beyond the shadow of a doubt, was wrong. So the decision that he made had to be a conscious decision.

One of my professors, Dr. Fount Schultz, at one point brought together some thoughts in relation to this topic. When God created man, did He create an incomplete person? Did he design man to only use a part of facilities? I don't believe that He did or would have. If He didn't create man to fully utilize His body and mind why would He have created them as He did? Currently as human beings we only actively use around 10% of our brain. I have heard that if our brains were utilized to their full potential, what we would be able to do is unimaginable. I know that for me there are days where i can't think or focus to stay on task and read and understand even light reading. Other times my mind is so clear and undistracted that i can get most anything done. On those kinds of days, reading a scientific paper and seeing problems and flaws as well as the potential and possibilities is in easy grasp. I can easily understand theories and concepts that the day before had my mind spinning before i even got past the first couple of sentences.

That change in our mental capabilities would have occurred at the fall of man, at the eating of the fruit. If/when that was the case, Eve taking the fruit and eating it would have changed everything. Adam would have been able to see immediately the difference in his bride. It's like working with the moderate to severely developmentally disabled. You don't need to be a genius to recognize the difference immediately. So when Eve took the fruit there is no doubt in my mind that Adam knew what had happened. So for him to make the decision to eat the fruit would have had to have been a conscious choice. So seeing the consequences why would he have done it?

More on this next week...

Image from harryalverson used under cc license.